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In this way, we are practicing the first two of the Buddha’s Noble Truths: awareness of suffering, and looking deeply to see its causes. The second aspect of healing is nourishing joy – the third and fourth Noble Truths.We look deeply into our lives and see that we have been wounded.But, we can still breathe, still smile, still sit stably, and still enjoy the wonders of life always available.We should not let one instant of betrayal color our whole world.If all we ever do is dwell with the suffering, we’ll create a rut in the mind.

And, as is also very common, that person was someone I lived with and had a very close relationship with.

When we’re hurt by others our tendency is to shift all our attention on them instead of the wounds in our heart.

Whether we entertain revenge fantasies or obsess ourselves with understanding their suffering, our habit is to escape our own hurt feelings.

We could also add to that list people whom have harmed us and wronged us. How can we feel compassion for those whom have caused us pain, when the anger and sadness are still so raw?

During retreats, this question is often asked of meditation teachers and their responses contain a lot of wisdom.

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